{"id":359,"date":"2021-11-28T07:21:16","date_gmt":"2021-11-28T06:21:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/?p=359"},"modified":"2022-08-08T11:55:27","modified_gmt":"2022-08-08T09:55:27","slug":"37-narsizm-ebeveyn-tarafindan-hem-genetik-duygu-algi-duesuence-bazi-hemde-ana-rahminde-baslamis-olan-cocugu-en-bastan-alaya-alma-prosedueruene-bir-tutulmusluktur","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/2021\/11\/28\/37-narsizm-ebeveyn-tarafindan-hem-genetik-duygu-algi-duesuence-bazi-hemde-ana-rahminde-baslamis-olan-cocugu-en-bastan-alaya-alma-prosedueruene-bir-tutulmusluktur\/","title":{"rendered":"37. Narsizm ebeveyn taraf\u0131ndan hem genetik duygu\/alg\u0131\/d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnce baz\u0131 hemde ana rahminde ba\u015flam\u0131\u015f olan \u00e7ocu\u011fu en ba\u015ftan alaya alma prosed\u00fcr\u00fcne bir tutulmu\u015fluktur"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Narsizm denen yo\u011fun semptomlu illet hem atalaradan gelecek nesile aktar\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 gibi hemde annenin bebe\u011fe gebelik s\u00fcre\u00e7inde de bebe\u011fin i\u00e7ine i\u015flemeyle yol al\u0131r. Bizlerin herhangi bir hastal\u0131\u011fa kilitlenebilmemiz incecik bir ipek ipli\u011fine ba\u011fl\u0131 gibi sanki. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc biz g\u00f6zlerimizle ya da duyular\u0131m\u0131zla\/alg\u0131lar\u0131m\u0131zla var olan bir olay\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u00fcz\/hissederiz ama arkas\u0131ndan gelen – ak\u0131\u015f\u0131m yasas\u0131 gere\u011fi – olan bitene bir alg\u0131 y\u00fckleme prosed\u00fcr\u00fc belirler bizim ileride o olay\u0131 hangi i\u00e7sel travmaya d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcrd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc. Burada s\u00f6z konusu olan mekanizma ise i\u015fte bizim i\u00e7 hassasiyetimizdir (duygusall\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z veya duyarl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z): Konulara, al\u0131glara, hislere y\u00fckledi\u011fimiz – daha do\u011frusu beynimizin y\u00fckledi\u011fi – anlamd\u0131r bizleri o travmalara kilitleyen.
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\u0130\u015fte ki\u015fisel geli\u015fim denen dev mekanizman\u0131n sa\u011flad\u0131\u011f\u0131 tam da bu: Bize hangi travmaya neden kodland\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 bize g\u00f6sterir. Ve biz o an o travmam\u0131z\u0131 inceleyip ve o travman\u0131n olu\u015ftu\u011fu ya\u015f\u0131m\u0131za geri d\u00f6nd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fczde (regresyon) ve o ya\u015f\u0131n d\u00f6nemindeki hissedilen yo\u011fun ac\u0131yla bug\u00fcn ve burada y\u00fczle\u015fme cesaretini g\u00f6sterdi\u011fimizde i\u015fte o ac\u0131 ba\u015flar yava\u015f yava\u015f sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131na kavu\u015fmaya. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc onun tek derdi g\u00f6r\u00fcnmek, bilinmek, alg\u0131lan\u0131lmak ve hissedilmekti. <\/span><\/p>\n

Anne karn\u0131nda veya da atalar\u0131m\u0131zdan direkt i\u00e7imizden tekrar bu aleme do\u011fan hisler i\u015fte hayat\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n devam ak\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 belirler ta ki biz bu konuda ay\u0131k\u0131p o durmadan g\u00fcnboyu hissettiklerimizi neden hissetti\u011fimizi – teker teker – sorgulayana dek. Bir de bakars\u0131n ki sen bir korku t\u00fcr\u00fc hissediyorsun ama bu korkuya bir anlam da veremiyorsun pek. Ve az \u00e7okta o korkunun temelinde nelerin de yatabilece\u011fini de hissediyorsun. Ve bu korkular\u0131nla y\u00fczle\u015fme cesaretini g\u00f6sterdikten sonra belki de o vakit ancak anlars\u0131n ki “aa bu korkunun temelindeki yatan \u015fey asl\u0131nda bu korkunun hi\u00e7te bana ait olmay\u0131\u015f\u0131d\u0131r, bu korku me\u011fersem anneanneme aitmi\u015f!!“, diyebilirsin de. Bu durumda anneanne o korkusunu hazmetmeyi \u00f6\u011frenmekten ka\u00e7\u0131nd\u0131\u011f\u0131 i\u00e7in bunu sana dev\u015firmi\u015f olabilir: \u00d6zde\u015fim\/\u0130dentification\/ba\u015fkas\u0131n\u0131n kimli\u011fini \u00fcstlenme: Ba\u015fkas\u0131na ait bir duyguyu\/hissi\/davran\u0131\u015f\u0131\/alg\u0131y\u0131 kendine ait zannetme durumu.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ger\u00e7ekten de inan\u0131lacak gibi de\u011fil ama bu bir ger\u00e7ek, etraf\u0131ndaki herkes sana kendine ait negatif bir davran\u0131\u015f kal\u0131b\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7ok rahat\u00e7a dev\u015firebilir. Bunlar enerji yoluyla olmaktad\u0131r: G\u00fclen birisinin yan\u0131nda sende g\u00fclersin, neye g\u00fcld\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc bilmesende g\u00fclersin, a\u011flayan\u0131n yan\u0131nda da a\u011flars\u0131n. <\/span><\/p>\n

Sana kendi i\u00e7 alemindeki bulunan o negatif kal\u0131b\u0131n\u0131 dev\u015firmi\u015f olan ki\u015fiye gelince, o ki\u015fi ne denli kal\u0131b\u0131n\u0131 bilin\u00e7alt\u0131na kilitlemeyi ba\u015farm\u0131\u015fsa sen de o hissi o denli kendine aitmi\u015f gibi hissedersin. Bu tip ki\u015filer sana bir de \u015funu s\u00f6ylerler “aa sende de \u015fu huy var ayol bu huyun hi\u00e7te g\u00fczel bir huy de\u011fil!!“ Bunu sana s\u00f6yleyen ki\u015finin bu bir kuruntusudur, belki de sende de ger\u00e7ekten o huydan mevcuttur ama, sana bunu dev\u015firen ki\u015fi s\u0131rf kendi i\u00e7 \u00e7irkinli\u011fini g\u00f6rmeye dahi katlanamad\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan dolay\u0131 sana kendi kal\u0131b\u0131n\u0131, sana aitmi\u015f gibi g\u00f6sterme \u00e7abas\u0131ndad\u0131r. Ne kadar da zavall\u0131 ya bu tiplemeler!:).. Kendi \u00e7irkef huylar\u0131n\u0131 ba\u015fkas\u0131na dev\u015firirken hi\u00e7 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnemiyorlarki “ya bu kar\u015f\u0131mdaki ki\u015fi bu negatif kal\u0131b\u0131n bana ait oldu\u011funu bir fark ederse?!“<\/span><\/p>\n

Gelelim nesilden nesillere aktar\u0131lanlara: E\u011fer bir bebek bir annenin g\u00f6z\u00fcnde de\u011ferliyse, onu neyder eder her t\u00fcrl\u00fc belalardan – elbette ki elinden geldi\u011fi – kadar korur. Annenin \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011funu koruyamad\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u015feylerde vard\u0131r, ben bunlara kadersel yap\u0131 diyorum. Anne bir\u015feyden \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011funu habire korumaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yor da o olay ters tepiyorsa, o \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011fun kadersel a\u00e7\u0131dan o bir ac\u0131y\u0131 ya\u015famas\u0131 gerekiyor. Anne bunu anlayarak kenara \u00e7ekilmeli ve de tabii ki de hem kendi kaderine hemde \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011fun ya\u015fayaca\u011f\u0131 kadere teslim olmal\u0131. Ama bunu anlamadan \u00f6nce\/alg\u0131ya sahip olmadan evvel mutlaka ama mutlaka bir aile o \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011fu en iyi \u015fekilde yeti\u015ftirmekle sorumludur ve y\u00fck\u00fcml\u00fcd\u00fcr. Bunun aksini yapm\u0131\u015f olan herkes ona Cenab\u0131 Hakk taraf\u0131ndan emanet edilmi\u015f olan o \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011fa bizzat ihanet etmi\u015ftir.<\/span><\/p>\n

Benim bu konudaki ara\u015ft\u0131rmalar\u0131m esnas\u0131nda ise ben \u015fu sorunla da kar\u015f\u0131 kar\u015f\u0131ya geldim: E\u011fer bir \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011fa genetik olarak atalar\u0131ndan psikopatl\u0131k aktar\u0131m\u0131 olduysa o \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011fu ileride nas\u0131l e\u011fitirsen e\u011fit ona ne \u00e7aba harcarsan harca o \u00e7o\u00e7uk i\u00e7indeki o fitne ve nifak tohumu b\u00fcy\u00fct\u00fcp besleyecektir. Bunu burada yazmak bile beni \u00e7ok ac\u0131t\u0131yor: O kadar emekler verdi\u011fin bir \u00e7o\u00e7uk \u00e7ok hasta bir ruh ta\u015f\u0131yor. Sanki ona verdi\u011fin emekler bo\u015fa \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f gibi geliyor insana! Ama y\u00fcce Yaratan Kur’an’da s\u00f6z vermi\u015ftir bize<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n

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Ya\u015far Nuri \u00d6zt\u00fcrk Kur’an-\u0131 Kerim Meali\/Enbiya 47. Ayet:
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K\u0131yamet g\u00fcn\u00fc i\u00e7in adalet terazilerini kuraca\u011f\u0131z\/adaleti terazilere koyaca\u011f\u0131z. Hi\u00e7 kimseye zerre kadar zul\u00fcm edilmeyecek. Hardal tanesi kadar bir\u015fey olsa onu ortaya getiririz. Hesap\u00e7\u0131lar olarak biz yeteriz!<\/span><\/div>\n\n\n
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Hi\u00e7bir verilen emek bo\u015fa \u00e7\u0131kmayacakt\u0131r.. Ve bu t\u00fcr hastal\u0131\u011f\u0131 i\u00e7inde ta\u015f\u0131yan bir \u00e7o\u00e7ukla ba\u015f etmek \u00e7ok \u00e7ok zor ama m\u00fcmk\u00fcn, y\u00fcce ha\u015fmetli Yaratan onun da sabr\u0131n\u0131 ve ilmini nasip ediyor insana. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00c7o\u00e7u\u011funu ise \u00f6nemsemi\u015f olan bir nesil o \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011fun en k\u0131demli ve de\u011ferli olgular\u0131 \u00f6\u011frenmesini sa\u011flam\u0131\u015f olan bir nesildir: Aile denilen birliktelik e\u011fer ki do\u011fru yolda ilerlemek istiyorsa \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011funa g\u00fczellikler \u00f6\u011fretmekle m\u00fckelleftir. Sadece bizzat \u00f6\u011fretmenin yan\u0131nda tabii ki de en ba\u015fta kendisi de rol model olmak zorundad\u0131r: Aile kendi ba\u011fr\u0131nda sahtekarl\u0131\u011f\u0131\/yalanc\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 bar\u0131nd\u0131r\u0131pta \u00e7o\u00e7u\u011fa “aman ha yalan s\u00f6yleme!!“ derse bu \u00e7ok sa\u00e7ma sapan olur!! Aile de yalan konu\u015fmamay\u0131 rol model olarark kendi ruhunda ve de hal ve hareketlerinde bizzat ya\u015famak zorundad\u0131r! ve bununla da evlad\u0131na \u00f6rnek olmak drumundad\u0131r. Bunun aksisi ise a\u00e7\u0131k ve net olarak iki y\u00fczl\u00fcl\u00fckt\u00fcr.
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Evlad\u0131n ne demek oldu\u011funu dahi bilmeyen ve bunu tecr\u00fcbe dahi etmek istemeyen tembellere ve kendine anababa dedirten tiplemelere gelince, i\u015fte bana g\u00f6re bunlard\u0131r \u00e7o\u00e7uklaryla ta onlar anne rahmindeyken dalga ge\u00e7enler, alay eden ve onlar\u0131 adam yurduna koymayanlar. O masum \u00e7o\u00e7uk ileride d\u00fcnyaya geldi\u011finde o anababa m\u00fcseveddelerine ancak u\u015fakl\u0131k hizmeti etmekle kalacak!, ta ki \u00e7o\u00e7uk ay\u0131k\u0131p anababa diye ge\u00e7inen o sahtekarlar\u0131n ne mal oldu\u011funu anlayana dek. O g\u00fcruhun tek bir derdi var: Aileye gelen yeni nesili kendi eksiklikleri ve egolar\u0131 do\u011frultusunda ruhen eyip b\u00fckmek ve onu hizmet verici yapmak: Efendi k\u00f6le ili\u015fkisinin ve de \u00e7\u0131kar ili\u015fkilerinin ad\u0131 aile olmu\u015f inan\u0131l\u0131r gibi de\u011fil!!!!! Ve ben bunlara her k\u00f6\u015fede \u00e7ok\u00e7a rastlad\u0131m. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00c7o\u00e7u\u011funa kar\u015f\u0131 o bir objeymi\u015f gibi davrananlar\u0131 burada \u015fiddetle k\u0131n\u0131yorum!! <\/span><\/p>\n\n

Ve Allah’\u0131n \u00f6nem verdi\u011fi g\u00fczellikleri yokmu\u015f say\u0131p ezip ge\u00e7mi\u015f olanlar\u0131n ta kendileri bizzat en b\u00fcy\u00fck alayd\u0131r. Ba\u015fkas\u0131yla s\u00fcrekli alay eden birisinin temelinde ise yatan i\u00e7ine do\u011fmu\u015f oldu\u011fu ortam\u0131n onu alay denen mekanizmayla beslemi\u015f olmas\u0131d\u0131r. Her nerede alay denen sistem kendi zinciri ve h\u00fck\u00fcmranl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 s\u00fcrd\u00fcr\u00fcyorsa akl\u0131 ba\u015f\u0131nda olan herkes onu bilip, bulup, ara\u015ft\u0131r\u0131p, inceleyip ve her yerde de\u015fifre etmek zorundad\u0131r. Bunu yapmayan herkes Allah’\u0131n bu konudaki ayetlerini yok sayarak o zalim\/m\u00fcnaf\u0131k toplulu\u011fun yan\u0131nda saf tutmu\u015ftur.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n

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Sure H\u00fcmeze 1. Ayet<\/span><\/p>\n

\u0130nsanlar\u0131 arkadan \u00e7eki\u015ftirmeyi, y\u00fczlerine kar\u015f\u0131 da el, ka\u015f, g\u00f6z i\u015faretleriyle alay etmeyi \u00e2det h\u00e2line getiren her bir ki\u015finin vay h\u00e2line!<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n

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08.08.22<\/span><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Narsizm denen yo\u011fun semptomlu illet hem atalaradan gelecek nesile aktar\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 gibi hemde annenin bebe\u011fe gebelik s\u00fcre\u00e7inde de bebe\u011fin i\u00e7ine i\u015flemeyle yol al\u0131r. Bizlerin herhangi bir …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2126,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[12],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-359","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-narsizm-olusum-temelinde-yatanlar-ve-beraberinde-getirdigi-hastaliklar-i"],"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280.jpg",1280,904,false],"thumbnail":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-150x150.jpg",150,150,true],"medium":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-300x300.jpg",300,300,true],"medium_large":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-768x768.jpg",768,768,true],"large":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-1024x904.jpg",1024,904,true],"1536x1536":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280.jpg",1280,904,false],"2048x2048":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280.jpg",1280,904,false],"post-thumbnail":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-425x300.jpg",425,300,true],"bravada-featured":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-583x300.jpg",583,300,true],"bravada-featured-lp":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-620x300.jpg",620,300,true],"bravada-featured-half":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-800x300.jpg",800,300,true],"bravada-featured-third":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-512x300.jpg",512,300,true],"bravada-lpbox-1":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-640x300.jpg",640,300,true],"bravada-lpbox-2":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-413x300.jpg",413,300,true],"woocommerce_thumbnail":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-300x300.jpg",300,300,true],"woocommerce_single":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-600x424.jpg",600,424,true],"woocommerce_gallery_thumbnail":["https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/blue-g41b094ad0_1280-100x100.jpg",100,100,true]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"elmas","author_link":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/author\/elmas2\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Narsizm denen yo\u011fun semptomlu illet hem atalaradan gelecek nesile aktar\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 gibi hemde annenin bebe\u011fe gebelik s\u00fcre\u00e7inde de bebe\u011fin i\u00e7ine i\u015flemeyle yol al\u0131r. Bizlerin herhangi bir …","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/359","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=359"}],"version-history":[{"count":77,"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/359\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2189,"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/359\/revisions\/2189"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2126"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=359"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=359"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eeelmas.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=359"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}